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go slowly all the way round the outside

‘This is probably what it would sound like if you made love to a Macintosh computer. Now, I’m not suggesting that you kick it laptop-style with your G4 but, in this instance, the result of such a union sounds pretty good. Acoustic gone wild: Recording studio fantasies!!!

Sure, Blusom co-creator Mike Behrenhausen may have been screaming out his computer’s name or operating system as he tooled with buttons in the studio but his eyes were closed, thinking about Wayne Coyne and Thom Yorke. His efforts were not in vain, either. Behrenhausen, and someone known only as Jme, have channeled the two musical savants. Consequently, their influences weigh heavy upon these songs.

The tracks typically begin with acoustic progressions that routinely spiral off into ambient tangents. Blusom strips off the layers of structure in exchange for noises that, had they been used to begin the songs, would classify this band as psychedelic or even New Age. Instead, the record has a Brit noise-pop feel to it, minus the Brits.

This Denver-based band has created something both unique and inspired while still a fraction derivative. Ironically, this seems to be the fate of those who stray from the norm. Too many bands head in similar “different” directions. Still, it’s a criticism worth receiving when the options are considered. It’s better than being compared to Staind, Trapt, or any of the other in the mass of illiterate bands plaguing the airwaves.

“Go Slowly All the Way Round the Outside,” a title that seems to suggest a set of instructions on how to bypass copy-protected records, is guaranteed to pique the curiosity of its audience. It is a satisfying listen that may have the listener thinking The Flaming Lips.

attention! blah blah blah

‘Attention! Blah Blah Blah” is, without a doubt, Atom?s most poignant release to date. tThat is not to say that it his best, though. It would be near impossible to top the pre-eminent release, ?Making Love.? “Attention” is running a close race for second with “A Society of People Named Elihu.”

Although still boyishly humorous, ?Attention? is all grown up. The silly giggling humor is more sophisticated, as are the songs and the recording itself.

For the past few releases, Atom has been making a switch from ?his package,? a Yamaha QY700 music sequencer, to guitar-based songs. The result is a new sound for a new generation of fans to appreciate.

If you are unfamiliar with the quirky Adam Goren, who has been loosely compared to They Might Be Giants and Weird Al, then you are missing out. As Adam states, the latter of the two comparisons do not make much sense. He is a much better musician and songwriter, but the comparison is noticeable, though.

Adam is a Philadelphia punk who was originally in the old school punk band Fracture. After their breakup, Adam began writing music on his keyboard with a half-serious intent. The music blew up bigger than anyone could have predicted, and a new niche was created in the punk scene that has yet to be duplicated. See the graphic on page B? for a description of some of the songs that built the shape into this niche.

If the Shel Silverstein reminiscent cover is not enticing enough, the song titles should do the job. They are hopeful promises of clever songs that the album tracks fulfill. Coincidentally, it follows that the most interesting song titles are also the most interesting songs as well. Here is a sample of a few of the best songs/song titles: “The Palestinians are not the Same Thing as the Rebel Alliance, Jackass,” Does Anyone Else In This Room Want to Marry His or Her Own Grandmother?,” “I’m Downright Amazed at What I can Destroy With Just a Hammer,” and “Dear Atom, You Do Not Want Children. Love, Atom.”

Don’t be cast aside the songs as being novel or frivolous. Atom may funny and quirky, but the song writing ability behind it all is undervalued.

On the whole, the album is impressive. The album will pay for itself after the countless listens that it is worth.rn

light up

‘It’s about time there’s a band out there with some balls. It’s reassuring to see someone stray from the trend and go the proven method of straight-up ass-kicking music. Just A Fire, your music is much anticipated and much welcomed.

Yes, Just A Fire. They’re the most recent musical endeavor that features members of Sweep the Leg Johnny, Hoover, Abilene as well as the long lineage of other bands that have spawned from artists Chris Daly and Fred Erskine.

This has got hints of both mid-’90s D.C. core and Asian Man Records in it. It’s part punk but also sways a bit towards that Police-influenced reggae side like many Asian Man bands do. Whatever, reggae can be cool – especially when it’s infused with screechy vocals and hard guitar rhythms. Conveniently, “Light Up” does that. What luck!

A handful of songs, like the catchy “Snake In That Bush,” – yes, it’s safe to assume that Bush is a reference to G.W., seeing as how the band is rooted in politics – sound directly ripped off of “Regatta de Blanc.” Fortunately, the band does not draw any of its influences from Sting’s solo work.

As you may already have guessed, Just A Fire sounds nothing like June of 44, Hoover, Sweep the Leg Johnny or Abilene. It’s a completely new route that these musicians are traversing together. Sure, the influences of those bands will always stay with them but that link is a bit obscure here. In a sense, this is something more timeless; something that is difficult to assign to a particular decade or scene. As a result, it is equally difficult to say who this album is for. It’s certainly not something intended to entertain adamant Republicans and strong supporters of the man we’ve sort of chosen to represent our country. Anyone else is fair game.

hail to the thief

‘The rumors from downloading and pirating enthusiasts may be true: It is time for Radiohead to bend over and grab their ankles.

Radiohead’s contract with the devil expired just shy of the “Hail to the Thief” recording sessions and renegotiations must still be in the process of being worked out. It’s a shame this matter could not be resolved a bit earlier. No one wants to hear that a Radiohead record is bad.

If a poorly written computer program was designed to randomly generate music based on the patterns of previous Radiohead songs, it very well could have anticipated the tracks on “Hail to the Thief.” To say the least, they have once again been unpredictable but, this time, they did it by doing what no one could have expected; by being completely predictable.

The band has hit a wall and hopefully that lofty airbag of accrued credits to their name will save their lives. (God, that was a horrible play on Radiohead lyrics.)

Of course any judgment of “Hail to the Thief,” the band’s sixth full-length studio album, is going to be a bit askew. What unit of measurement do you use to gauge the quality of such an album? They have been known to consistently raise the benchmark of musical innovation with each subsequent release. Now, they can easily limbo underneath that bar.

Will a top-of-the-line shortsightedness doom the mediocre to be viewed as minimal in terms of effort and, at points, downright lazy?

In the grand scheme of things, this album is decent. It surpasses the ranks of the generic and makes it to the low-end cut of the medium-quality showroom. If this was a freshman product, it would show great promise and potential. Many artists would even kill to write an album such as this. For the weathered veterans of Radiohead, “Hail” flies dangerously low under the radar they established. With any luck, it will go undetected, leaving hope for any future productions.

Especially at the head of the class, there is no excuse for the senior slide, or for a band to just get by every once in a while.

http://www.thelonelyisland.com

‘All right people, HM is back and we’re done with that “worst of” shit. Who thought of that idea anyway? Like anyone wants to see a bunch of awful Web sites that are just a waste of time.

Well, the joke is on you, suckers. You read the articles and visited the sites. Don’t lie, we know you did. We’re tracking your IP addresses and know where you’ve been surfing, which reminds us, goat porn is disgusting. Stop looking at it.

OK, OK, to make up for the crappy Web sites we’ve thrown your way over the past, umm, month or so, we’re going to present to you a content-heavy comical site that is bound to keep you laughing for seconds to hours, depending upon your attention span and enjoyment of dry humor – or if you have a sense of humor at all.

This week, fine folks, we give to you The Lonely Island. TLI is made up of three filmmakers, although it seems more accurate to say film students, based in Los Angeles, CA. As listed on the site, they are Jorm! Kiv! and Ardy! Their short but explosive (sometimes literally) clips are hit or miss, but more often a hit than not.

For those of you who are in their 30s and up or are Boulder natives, think back to when Trey Parker and Matt Stone got their start in Colorado. Remember watching their first clip that eventually became a cult classic on the Internet, “The Spirit of Christmas.”

Or, remember packing into the Flatiron Theater to watch the hilarious but underappreciated and soon renamed “Alferd Packer: The Musical.” You knew these guys were going to make it and it felt good to know them before the Comedy Central debut of “South Park.”

These three exclamation-punctuated folks probably won’t enjoy that kind of success. Still, thanks to the Internet, such dry wit as theirs can be appreciated from home, regardless of where the filmmakers call home.

Best clip: “Nintendo.” It’ll have you laughing out loud and quoting lines like, “I’m glad I wore these pants” and “That was awkward” until the people around you tell you to stop and that you’re being annoying.

Dalley does Denver

‘In the face of adversity and a long-term indefinite hiatus from his one-time main musical project, Desaparecidos, Denver Dalley has taken a liking to his newfound motto of self-reliance. Standing by a personal declaration of independence for his current one-man band, Statistics, is the only way to he knows he will definitely get things done.

Dalley admits that he intended for Desaparecidos to be his full-time gig but the different schedules of the band members have made it difficult for them to find time to play together, let alone record their supposed follow-up to “Read Music Speak Spanish.”

The big problem: the media and pop culture’s obsession with Conor Oberst. He simply will not be let out of the limelight. So, the rest of Desa has had more than their fair share of downtime while he focused on his other band, Bright Eyes.

Originally, Desa had plans to spend this January and February in the studio recording their new album. Now, it’s uncertain if and when that may happen. Fortunately, Dalley – who admits that he has never been to Denver – is no longer waiting around. He’s got his own band and a packed touring schedule to boot.

“As an artist, you may be happy with what you’ve done but you’ve always got to look ahead to the future,” Dalley began. “You’ve got to think of what to do next.”

About a year and a half ago, he decided to focus on synth-pop, a new genre for him. Citing musicians who have a different take on the traditional elements they use, like Rage Against the Machine and The White Stripes as examples, he attempts to redefine the way he uses the instruments at his disposal. With a highly touted EP and newly released full-length under his belt already, his intentions appear to be working out.

“It just feels so rewarding because I did it all on my own,” he said. “It’s difficult when you don’t have anyone else to rely on but the payoff is greater. It’s not like I did all these things and I’m so great. It’s just that I did it all on my own, you know?”

As part of his current sovereign stance, he decided to seek out a new label with whom he could work. Saddle Creek and Jade Tree have been known to produce his favorite bands and albums. Since he has already worked with Saddle Creek, Jade Tree was the only logical choice for his Statistics project.

Not knowing what to expect, he sent them a demo. A week later, the label flew him up to Delaware and signed him. Neither party ever looked back.

Statistics has afforded him the opportunity to test his limits and, possibly, provide a friendly rival to Oberst’s confessional songwriting in Bright Eyes.

“Conor and I literally grew up together,” he said. “I’ve known him since we were in the fourth grade. He put out his first tape when he was like 13. He’s been working on music for over a decade now and I think that his work has paid off, big-time.”

He shows no sign of being bitter. He believes that Oberst is very likeable and it’s just odd to think about someone you know becoming so popular. To him, “Conor’s always been the same guy.”

The true question at hand has little to do with Bright Eyes, Statistics or any of the musicians involved. The inevitable occurred when the question arose about whether or not Oberst groupie Winona Ryder is as attractive in person as she is on screen.

Sadly, he has not accompanied Bright Eyes on any of their tours and, now that Oberst lives in New York, he did not have the opportunity to meet Miss Ryder.

On the other hand, he did discuss the matter with the Bright Eyes tour manager who “managed all these big acts back in the day.”

“In sports, when you do something really great, the President gives you a call,” said the tour manager to Dalley. “In music, when you do something really great, Winona Ryder gives you a call.”

Well, folks, if there ever was a reason to be a rock star, this is it.

give people what they want in lethal doses

‘It’s true that Challenger may be the collaboration of two Milemarker members, Al Burian and Dave Laney, but in no way does this qualify as a one-off or a side project. This is the real thing, an entirely new and separate entity from their mother project, which is known for its gloomy electro-rock.

“Give People What They Want In Lethal Doses” aligns itself with Fracture- and Lifetime-era hardcore, and is inspired by the likes of Husker Du, with a twist of insatiable Against Me!- or Piebald-style tongue-in-cheek wit.

The guitar work is replete with heaviness and takes the main stage in the mixdown. Sometimes minimal bass work, and virtually no synthesizers, can be found on this recording.

Punchy punk such as this has been known to border on the generic, depending on how well the musicians in question can pull it off. Well, Challenger ably pulls it off but, as insurance, they catch you with their lyrics. Rap song-style lines and references like “Can I kick it?,” “It’s not about the money,” “Bling bling” (or at least that sounds like what they’re singing), “Throw your hands in the air” and the catchy chorus “It’s all right if you want to spend the night” pervade the album. Such elements make Challenger much more listener-friendly than Milemarker.

Laney states that a lot of musicians have been mastering the art of writing slow, sad songs. So, it probably seemed natural for him to flex his versatility muscle and take the songwriting style in which he has been pigeonholed and throw it out the window.

Many artists may find themselves in a bit too comfortable or conservative a position to want to start over from scratch, but Laney and Burian show no hesitation on this debut. A confident level of familiarity backs each track of the record, the true test of multi-leveled musicians.

Challenger fluidly writes within the boundaries of three or so minutes while still retaining the full impact of more drawn-out songs. As opposed to the blah nature of many other contemporary musicians in this category, the band has scrutinized the most nebulous details. In addition, they capitalized on their latent songwriting talents while still managing not to take themselves too seriously – something that cannot be taught but can only be learned through experience. Thank Milemarker for that.

http://www.cockeyed.com

‘Talk about a man with an overactive imagination and too much time on his hands. That is Rob Cockerham, creator of Cockeyed.com. Think of him as a cross between Mr. Wizard and MacGyver, except younger and a lot more fun.

This site filled with self-described harmless pranks, experiments and a whole slew of trivial pursuits.

Let’s start with the immature stuff first. One of the many lists compiled on this site is titled “13 Naughty Food Items.” There’s a male and a female diagram pointing out the biological parts to which the snacks refer. The list includes: Cock Soup, Erectus, Super Titi 33, Under Horny Cream, Donkey Balls and more.

Naturally, this was the first part of the site that grabbed our attention.

From there, we checked out “12 Pranks.” On a dessert menu outside of more than a handful of McDonald’s, Rob deemed it necessary to alter the apple pie advertisements. With the assistance of various Adobe programs, he added the unknowing endorsement of American Pie star Jason Biggs. In another prank, a fake sign was made that stated “Buy 2 Get 1 Free.” The sign was installed at a busy shopping center with numerous stores and featured a spinning arrow. As a result, every time the arrow moved, it offered the special from a different store.

The two most interesting and well-thought-out subsections of this site are “How Much Is Inside? Adventures” and “Science Club Presents.”

“How Much is Inside?” takes commercial products from Sharpies to shaving cream to a Chevy Trailblazer and determines various aspects of the contents’ worth. The Sharpies test figured out how many CD labels it would take to empty a Sharpie marker. The shaving cream test determined how big a pile of shaving stuff a container could make. The Trailblazer, well, that’s a different story.

As a part of a contest Rob and pals tried to deduce how many “76” Antenna Balls could be stuffed into a Trailblazer. To make a long story short, lots of cheating occurred and the whole episode ended with some car keying. Check out the site for the entire amusing tale.

Science Club Presents is equally playful, tackling topics like Tampon Research and Hot Pocket Dissection.

http://intuitor.com/moviephysics

‘On this site, some of the top-grossing movies of the past decade have been reviewed from a scientist’s perspective. The reviews are written, for the most part, in laymen’s terms and are easy to understand. What they say are usually simple common-sense evaluations (aside from the occasional complex mathematical equation) but the average moviegoer probably does not think of movies from this perspective. In addition, we enjoyed the site because it made us feel more like a member of the intellectually elite community.

The most attractive reviews on the site are the big sci-fi names: “Star Wars: Episode I,” “A.I.,” and “The Matrix.” They provide a good example, not only for what you’re getting into when you read these reviews, but also what you’re getting into when you fall prey to Hollywood’s bright lights and special effects.

The review of “The Matrix” is cynically berating at points, but it also acknowledges the loopholes and outs set up by directors. The reviewer allows the Hackers to escape the laws of physics, but mere humans have to obey the laws. After working smoothly around the escapes from logic the Wachowski brothers built into the film, the article has this to say about the computer power problem in the movie:

“To cover itself, the movie throws in a quick mention that the human energy source powering the machines is combined with a source of fusion. This is like getting on a 747 and having the captain explain in great detail that the plane is rubber-band powered, then add that it also has four jet engines. Guess which power source gets it off the ground, duh.”

The whole Intuitor.com site is an impressive wealth of information. It is a good educational resource. The Insultingly Stupid Movie Physics page is the most eye-catching subsection of the site because it combines insult with intellect. As Zadie Smith writes in her first novel, “White Teeth,” “Can’t say fairer than that.”

Ohio, Instrumentals and biscuits

‘Ohio is not exactly a hotbed of entertainment these days. Sure, they’ve got The Black Keys and Drew Carrey, but what else of note has sprung up from this concrete paradise?

Besides a slew of interesting state laws, including the illegality of getting a fish drunk and forbidding women from wearing patent-leather shoes, Ohio harbors something special, a band that may just prove to be music’s most well-kept secret. Somewhere in the streets of Kent, The Six Parts Seven was born. They, unlike most other rock-inspired groups, have chosen to silence their voices in order to empower their instruments.

“Kent is a really good place for music,” said Tim Gerak, one of three guitarists in The Six Parts Seven. “Not many bands seem to make it out of there but I think that’s because nobody is trying to be ‘that band.’”

Straying from the beaten path of “that band” can be a slow and steady course, especially for an instrumental group, but they will not be deterred that easily. Their perseverance and natural penchant for musicianship has brought them, and The Black Keys, out head and shoulders above the rest of what the state has to offer musically.

As a matter of fact, the two bands just released a self-titled, split EP. In addition, T6P7 recently released “Lost Notes from Forgotten Songs.” The album is a tribute that has been paid to the band. Various artists reworked a collection of the group’s songs and added vocal components to them. It just goes to show you that sometimes it is not about success; it is about respect.

To Gerak, that respect may have been commandeered by the group’s tightness and instinctual abilities to know what to do when and when not to do it.

“We’ve really been lucky because everybody in the band knows when to play and when not to play,” he said. “We try not to over- or underdo it.”

This is especially difficult for them since the band has three guitarists. Intertwining seamless guitar parts can be a laborious task that, fortunately, has yielded positive results for them. They’ve got their methodology down pat and can stand up to any challenge.

A band that walks away from convention has additional obstacles to overcome in order to be successful. They need to not only add multiple dimensions to their songs, but they need to find a way to make them accessible to the listener. It’s a paradox; you need to be complex while simultaneously being simple.

“It’s tough because people have to look into the music a little more,” he continued. “Once you’re into it, though, it’s easier to put something on that sets the mood rather than something that tells a particular story.”

Gerak believes that listening to instrumental music is often easier for him. It allows him to interpret a song any way he wants, including the ability to write his own vocals to a tune. This is something he hopes fans can do with his band’s songs as well.

One overwhelming task the band has had difficulty escaping from is superficial comparisons. They feel like they get lumped into a category in which they do not belong.

“It gets frustrating to get compared to the same instrumental bands over and over again,” admitted Gerak. “We don’t sound anything like a lot of bands we get lumped in with. It’s just that people have no point of reference. There aren’t a ton of instrumental bands out there.”

One way that they may be able to overcome this is with their live shows. Seeing the band live in concert will further prove that they have little in common with the likes of Tristezza or Mogwai. Fans will also be treated to Southern hymns, one of which is even about biscuits. This singing is courtesy of new guitarist Mike Tolan and new lap-steel player Ben Vaughan. They both sing in other projects and have taken to writing hymns that they belt out in between songs from the band’s set.

Chris Rock once said in his tune “No Sex in the Champagne Room” that there ain’t nothing wrong with cornbread. Well, there ain’t nothing wrong with songs about biscuits either.